I'll miss you
by Flower-Bee
Summary: Lily and James. James and Lily. They secretly love each other, but too scared to say anything. But when Lily moves in with James, thing start to get romantic. Rated for language.
1. Chapter One: Puke Attack!

Disclaimer: I own nothing, except the plot, which was my dream! And No, I am not going to you who 'James' was.. well, maybe, if you're nice!  
  
"May I have this dance?" James asked me, offering his hand. Just like he did, when I first met him, seven years ago, on platform 9 3/4.  
  
"I'd love to," I accepted his hand and we walked to the dance floor. Michelle Branch was playing, my favourite song, which I asked for, "Goodbye to you." I could listen to it all day. Everyone and everything was so perfect on my first night back from Hogwarts, which I had finished. Everyone was dancing, all except Chris, whom I turned down at the Party. I could feel his eyes watching me, every move I made. It made me feel extremely uncomfortable.  
  
I started to tremble as I wrapped my arms around James's neck and he placing his hands on my hips. Gosh! Help me! I couldn't help it. He, James, was just so gorgeous. I was so lucky to be his best friend but I loved him more than a mate way. Much, much more.  
  
"Well, after tonight, we'll be going to our colleges," he said, sadly.  
  
"Yeah, I know," I replied, looking at the floor, then back to his eyes. I am going to a muggle college, which was in Oxford, and James is going to the Wizard one, called Wizard's Finial Step. "I'll miss you. Loadsa."  
  
"Me too, Lil. Me too," he said.  
  
"You look really handsome tonight," I said, blushing. He was wearing a tux, without the tie or bow, and his hair was extra scruffy, more than usual. His blue eyes were shiner than usual and his cheeks were a bit red. His hair was teasing me to stroke it and ran my fingers through it.  
  
"You've told me that tonight already. Five times, in fact," he chuckled.  
  
"Oh, sorry." I said, biting my lips a bit. "But you do."  
  
"You look very beautiful. I'd say the most beautiful girl here tonight is you."  
  
I absolutely blushed scarlet. I looked pretty tonight, fair enough, but. beautiful? I was wearing my mum's old dress; it was midnight blue, with beards on the bottom.  
  
"You're lying," I muttered, feeling very foolish.  
  
He leaned his forehead onto mine. "I'm not and you know it."  
  
I smiled and replied, "You're so sweet. Thanks for being my date and everything."  
  
"What are mates for then?" he asked.  
  
We went quiet for a while. I keep looking around. Everyone, mostly the girls, but some boys, was going me evil looks. I was used to it. Everyone and anyone wanted to be James's friend, just because he was popular and everyone's favourite guy. I was James's mate because he was kind and understands me, the only person who does. He was my perfect mate.  
  
Suddenly the music stopped. Everyone stopped danced, started to moaned and looked towards the DJ. I looked at James, who looked back, confused, then we saw Chris, with the microphone and the plug to the DJ set. "Lily." He kept on saying, "I 'uvre yu." everyone could tell he was drunk because he was swaying backwards and forwards, and that he was hiccuping every five seconds. I covered my face with my hands, to hide the crimson face. "Lily, you slut, dumping me, -HIC- five years ago. I 'uvre yu. I wanna -HIC- you ssooo much." he was face to face with me, his breath smelt strongly of beer. "I'm sur- sur- HIC- surprised that yu've hadn't dumped Jamie boy here. Or do you actually have feelings for him?"  
  
"Err. Chris," James tapped him on the shoulder and, as soon as Chris faced him, James punched him so hard on the nose that he fell backwards, with a heavy bleeding nose.  
  
"You fucking bastard!" Chris shouted, getting to his feet, covering his bloody nose. "Why fight me?"  
  
"Just leave Lily alone. She doesn't want you and she never will," James said, through gritted teeth, standing in front of me, holding my hand, as I trembled behind him.  
  
"You know -HIC- we have a thing in common. We both want -HIC - her. You may fancy her, l-l- -HIC- lust," he was now spraying spit everywhere. "But I," now pointing to him proudly, " love her." He looked at me, straight in the eyes and said, "Lils, look at me. I need you."  
  
I was so cross, upset and a bit scared all at once. "No, you don't. You'll live, now please put the music back on please." I took a step forward. "Please?"  
  
"As long I can," he said something so gross and disgusting that it had gone to far.  
  
With all my might, I slapped him across the face and said, "You sick twisted prevent!" But that was a BIG mistake. Violently, Chris threw up all over my dress and me. I was so shocked I couldn't speak. The manager of the 'Day and Night' came to the rescue, taking Chris away from the main hall and saying something to me about getting change into something.  
  
I bit my lip, which didn't have vomit on it and I had a little sob, James was still next to me. "That fucking son of a bitch!" I said, through tears.  
  
James was about to hug me, to stop me crying, but thought better of it. Instead, he took my hand and said, "Shh, Lil, don't cry. Let's get you changed C'mon."  
  
And he led me to the Girls' loo. Not feeling at all shy, he came in with me. The Girls already in there, who were doing their make up, screamed and ran out the loos.  
  
He chuckled and he said, "I'll get you some clothes. Do you have any in your locker?" Sniffing, I nodded. Oh, sorry, I didn't tell you, did I? I work at the 'Day and Night' at the weekends. "Good, just wait here. Won't be two ticks."  
  
I nodded again and just as he was about to leave, "James, thank you. For what you did back there."  
  
"No probs," he said, and walked out. I brushed my hair, with my brush, which was in my bag. Unluckily, it brushed out my curls, but it was still quite wavy and I liked it better. I washed off the vomit, off my arms and face. Great Chris, just great. You actually how to impress women, I thought, bitterly.  
  
James came back, with my share clothes, "Thanks," and he handed them to me. I went into a cubicle and took off my dress and put on my demin long skirt, with flared across the floor and my khaki short sleeved shirt. "James," He grunted to show that he was looking. "Do you think he was telling the truth about being in love with me?"  
  
"I guess so. Sorry, but no one lies when they're drunk."  
  
"But he said that you fancied me, and that's not truth, is it?"  
  
"Well, most of the time, then," he replied quickly.  
  
"Oh. OK then, if you say so," I opened the door and walked out. "Do I look alright? Do I stink of puke?"  
  
"Yeah, you look beautiful," he smiled, taking a step closer to me, which made me grin. I liked him calling me beautiful. Then he held his nose. "But, you smell a bit of sick."  
  
"Oh great!" I said, rolling me eyes, and took out my perfume, lemon and lime, and spray it over me body. "Better?"  
  
"Much," he said.  
  
"Ok, what to do with my hair? Up or down, as my curls fell out?"  
  
"Hair down, I like it like this," he ran his fingers through my hair and scratched a little spot on the back of my neck.  
  
I blushed scarlet but I was in utter bliss. Our faces were moving closer, I swore they were. My stomach felt like it was doing somersaults and backward flips and for one as well and my eyes went a bit fuzzy. He slowly wrapped his arms around my waist, and pulled me closer. I wrapped my arm around his as well. He was rubbing his hand up and down my back, which get me chills, good ones, I mean. I think this is the closest I've got with a boy. I gulped loudly, god I hated being shy with boys. I stammered, "I-I think we- we should get back, its near-ly over."  
  
James nodded, sadly, and he let go of me. "Yeah, C'mon." and we walked out of the loos, feeling very uncomfortable, not looking at each other in the eyes. I found an empty plastic bag, so I stuff my dress in it and put in under a table. I'll get it, after the Party. Hopefully, my night will improve...  
  
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So wot do ya fink? Review!! plz.. 


	2. Chapter Two: The Dream!

Disclaimer: I only own the plot, not the characters, but Lily Evans's personality is I, Lily Barnes, so. er. yeah. ok then, onward to the story!!!! (sorry, I've always wanted to say that, please do not ask why)  
  
Warning! This has a *rape* dream in this so, its just a warning, so you are warned, so, don't blame my for not warning you, so pay attention to this warning. By The Way, this is the warning... *Everyone looks at Lily strangely* What?!  
  
James and I danced a couple more times and said good bye to all of our friends. "God," I said, as we started to walk to James's flat, which was opposite the school. "Tonight was the best night of my life. Apart from the fact that I got sick all over my best dress."  
  
"Oh, don't worry, we'll wash it, when we get home." James said.  
  
"Thanks again. For everything, being my date and sticking up for me, when Chris." I trailed off. I felt my blood boil. God, how much I hate him!  
  
"Oh, Lily, I'm so sorry. He's just 'Fat Bastard'. Except from the Scottish accent part," he chuckled. I let out a weak laugh. He knew that I was still upset by the vomit event, so, to comfort me, he wrapped his arm around me, "Listen, do you want to sleep round mine? We'll have a laugh, like we usually do."  
  
I looked at him and smiled, leaning my head on his chest and hugging him, closely, feeling as safe as ever. "I'd like that," and after that, we walked to James's home, in silence. We reached the apartments a few moments later and we took the lift to his flat and walked in. I loved it here- its so modern. I called mum as James got out all the junkie food, we decided to have a pig-out.  
  
"Mum said it was OK," I said as I walked in the living room, just to see James already half way through the crisps. "Oy!" I jumped over the sofa and sat next to him, "You could have waited for me!" I give him a playful push and snatched the crisps out of his hand. Then we talked about everything. Movies, Celebes, The Order of Phoenix, books, the future and stuff like that.  
  
"Lil," James said, looking serious, "Do you like it here?"  
  
"Here?"  
  
"In my apartment, I mean."  
  
"Oh yes, I love it here. It's the best, why you ask?"  
  
"I-I-I," he stammered, then he took a deep breath. "I was wondering if you would like to move in with me?"  
  
I was so happy, I thought I was gonna burst, like a balloon. "What? Live here, with you and the others?"  
  
"Yeah. Well, you nearly already live here anyway and this way, when we go to college, we wouldn't miss each other. So, what do you think? Wanna move in?"  
  
I just stared at him, then I hugged him tightly. "Yes, I'd love to."  
  
"Glad to hear that because all of your stuff is already here," James said, grinning.  
  
"What!?" I stared at him, confused and surprised at the same time.  
  
"I asked your mum to drop all of your stuff over and put it in your room and sort it all out. Do you want to see it?"  
  
"Hell yeah!" I jumped to my feet, whilst James laughed at me lead me to his study. Actually, it only have a desk and a lot of papers on something, I never really had a look. "Err. I'll be living in your study?"  
  
"No, it's not a study, anymore. Let me welcome you to your brand new bedroom!" and he opened the door wide. I gasped, with my hand over my mouth. It was so. so. Lilish. It had purple and blue walls. All of my books (I noticed that there was about ten new ones as well) were in a large bookcase; my king size double bed was made with feathered full blankets and pillows. I also noticed that there was picture on the walls of my family, me, James and his parents and sister, Sophie.  
  
"I-I- I dunno what to say," I whispered, a cheek, running down my cheek. "It's my dream room. I had a design on my dream room; Petunia had one too." We had designed BEFORE she knew I was a witch and started to act towards me like a piece of shit, I add, in my head, though, not aloud.  
  
"Well, let's just say, I did a bit of digging," He replied, smiled mischiefly. "But I'm not done yet. Look under the bed." I looked at him, confused. "Just do it. Trust me." I nodded and reached under my bed. I found a parcel and pulled it out, and sat on the bed, next to James. I looked at him and was about to say I couldn't have to, even though I didn't know what it was, but he said, "Open it, please."  
  
So, slowly, I opened the wrapping and it revealed a laptop. Not any laptop, but the most updated one, which cost two thousand pounds. "No way," I muttered. "I couldn't accept it. I just couldn't."  
  
"Well, tough. It's a gift. You have to," James said, "So I take it that you like it? I'm mean the whole moving in thing and everything."  
  
"Like it?" I gasped at him, like he was an idiot. "I love it, you idiot! Bloody, look at me. Crying." I took a little sniff and wept my eyes with the back of my hand. "Thanks, thank you. Thanks. God, can't stop saying thanks."  
  
James hugged me and said, "Look, you've got work in the morning. Better get to sleep. See ya in the AM." He walked out, winking at me, which made me stomach flutter, and blush like a fool.  
  
I sighed and looked around the room. This was just so.. So... WOW! I started to look through the draws to find my PJs, found them in the second draw; got dress and jumped into my new bed. It was just so perfect, life was perfect, everything was perfect..  
  
**//Dream//**  
  
Lily was standing there, in pitch black, wearing her blue dress, thinking what the fuck am I doing here? "Hello?" She shouted, "Is anyone there?" There was a low laughing, but from no body. "Who's there? Show yourself!" She had to admit she was getting a bit scared.  
  
Suddenly, Chris was standing in front of her. "Hello," he said,.  
  
"Oh, it's you, just pissed off!" Lily said, taking a step back. Chris's eyes were firing with passion, and madness.  
  
"He hates you, James does, he'll never love you, the way that you want him to, not like me," He got closer to Lily, who tried to take a step back, but couldn't, like she was glued to the floor.  
  
"If you get any closer, I'll scream," She spited, menacingly, narrowing her emerald eyes, and clenching her fists.  
  
Chris held up his hands and smiled evilly, "Who'll hear? Anyway," He was just inches to lily's face, and she just realised something, she couldn't move any part of her body. She couldn't escape! "It'll be the best time of your life." and he started to undo all of her clothes. Lily struggled with all her might, but she couldn't. She started to cry.  
  
"Please Chris, leave me alone." She whispered, tearing streaming down her rosy cheeks, but he just ignored her. She was bare to the bone now, and she was helpless, she didn't have her wand with her, nothing. Chris started to unzip his trousers and dropped them to the floor. He drew closer to Lily, his eyes fiery, with the still same passion and madness, and he slid his penis into Lily.  
  
Lily, knowing it wouldn't help, scream at the top of her voice, praying someone would hear...  
  
"Lil! Lily!"  
  
**// End of Dream //**  
  
"Lily! Lil!"  
  
I woke up, bolting up right, tears still running down my face, screaming still. When I realised that I was awake, I started to breathe heavily. "Lil?" James was sitting on my bed. Just one look at him, and I burst into tears again. I buried my face into his shoulders, and he hugged him, and rocking me slightly, to soothe me. "Shh... Shh... It was only a dream, don't worry."  
  
"He - He tried to.." I trembled, not even wanting to think again it.  
  
"Don't worry, I'm here," I lifted my head. Yes, James was here, nothing was wrong now. "Listen, Sirius or Remus are back yet, so do you want me to stay here with you tonight?"  
  
I mumbled a 'yes' and James got under my covers. I leaned on his chest, hearing his heart beat, which was faster than usual, and hugged him, all through the night, feeling like I was in heaven and fell asleep in my love's arms.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Hi, well, thanks 2 all of my reviewas, and I no, the vomit thing was a bit gross but I hopd you lykd this chapter! The nex 1 will be in James's POV, lyk sum1 (soz, 4got ur name! SOZ!) asked 4.  
  
LiLz-BaRneY xxx 


	3. Chapter Three: Socks and Sausages!

Disclaimer: I own nothing, so if you sue me, I'll sue you.  
  
A/N: Hi, well, this is in James's point of view, and I'm sorry that I took so long! Thanks for all da reviews!!!!!  
  
I woke up, without opening my eyes, and felt something lying on my chest. It felt so comfortable; I didn't want to move ever again. Something light, silky, and.. Alive! I could felt the person breathing deeply, and felt.. Oh god! It was a girl! I opened a fraction of my eye and looked down at my chest. A fiery red haired and pale skinned someone was hugging me. A snowy arm around my middle, and her chest at my side, with my arm around her.  
  
Oh no. I opened my eyes fully, hoping it wasn't the person who I thought it was. But it was. Lily. She looked so beautiful when she was asleep, so innocent and young, even though she was the same age as I was. I blushed, and I sat up, Lily's head still on my chest, still in her beauty sleep, not that she needs it. I just wanted to kiss her red hair, smell it over and over again.  
  
I looked over to the to Lily's muggle clock and it said it was 12:34pm. I yawned, still half-dreaming, and I fell back asleep, running my fingers through Lily's hair...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sizzling sounds. Travelling in my ears, hungrily. I licked my lips. Bacon. Sausages. Eggs. Pancakes. I opened my eyes slowly, like they were glued together, and saw I was still in Lily's bed. And.. Oh dear god! A dribble pad! Not just a little one, but the size of my palm! Oh shit! I got the blanket and covered it, so no one would notice. Hope Lily doesn't notice! I thought, and I dragged myself out of bed and towards the smell of the fry up.  
  
When I enter the Kitchen, I saw Lily over the oven. She was dressed, in tight, but flared jeans and a pink skirt, in Sirius's apron, and flipped a pancake three feet in the air and it landed perfectly in the pan. I leaned against the door and grinned. She still hadn't noticed me. She was looking for plates as she said under her breath, "Bloody plates! Where are you?" She bent over the cupboard. Oh dear Merlin! Her ass! It was more tight and fit than I thought. I gulped loudly, biting my lips hardly. Stop it! Stop it!  
  
I still stood there, just staring at her, whilst she was continuing to make breakfast. I think that she forget that she can cook with magic! "You know," I said, "You are a legal witch which means you can do magic!"  
  
Lily jumped, nearly dropping the plates in her hands. "Oh! James! You made me jumped! Don't laugh at me, I nearly had a heart a attack!" She said, as I laughed, sitting down at the table.  
  
"So, what's with the grub? Without magic?" I asked, raising an eyebrow, as Lily put on the table two plates of eggs, sausages, bacon, toast, pancakes and tomatoes.  
  
"A Muggle cooked English Breakfast." She said, handing out the knife and fork, for each of us. "I've already cooked for Remus and Sirius, and they lurve-ed it, so hope you enjoy." She smiled, and sat down, next to me.  
  
We ate in silence, with a few glances at each other, sometimes catching eyes, and blushing furiously. "James.?" Lily said, quiet timidly.  
  
"Yeah?" I looked at her, deeply in her emerald eyes. God, I could just look in them all day, I love how they sparkle when she's happy.  
  
"You know, what happened last night, when you came in, when I was having that - that nightmare." I nodded, and put an arm around her, as she looked like she was about to burst into tears. "I just want to say - say Thank you."  
  
I blushed slightly, mumbling something like 'It was nothing.' I still had my arm around her waist, and she was still looking at me with her magical eyes. Suddenly, the same butterfly feeling in my stomach came again. Like it had last night, in the Girls toilets and the same again, when we first met, she we bumped into each other. My mouth was opening and closing. I wanted to say so many things but nothing came out. I felt her cold hand lacing through mine, as we drew closer.  
  
Lily let out a small giggle, smiling even more. "You just make things so right, things all OK, like there's no evil and wrong in the world." She whispered, quiet breathlessly. Her cheeks were crimson, and were just begging for me to kiss them over and over again. "James... " she almost purred, so quiet, that I nearly didn't hear it.  
  
"Lily.." I gasped, and I leaned down. The temptation was just took over me, I had no control what so ever. I wanted to kiss her. I had to. A shiver ran down my spine as I felt her sweet breath on my lips. Her eyes were closed and her lips were as full and red as any beautiful rose. Any second we would kiss and the whole world would be at peace..  
  
"OY! PRONGS HAVE YOU SEEN MY SOCKS?" I heard Sirius shout, from his bedroom. Lily and me jumped out of our skins and I turned my head to the door. Stupid fucking Padfoot, I thought, and I nearly shouted it as well.  
  
"I dunno! Look in your sock draw!" I shouted, and I turned back to Lily, who was looking everywhere except me. I heard Sirius then say, "Ah, YES! Here they are. THANKS JAMES!" T I blushed a little more, and I kissed her as gently as I could on the cheek, and whispered in her ear. "Come to Café Uno, at nine this evening. We'll have dinner. Celebrate of you staying here. Just you and me."  
  
Lily finally looked at me, hand on the cheek I kissed and nodded. "I'd liked that." She said, with the small smile. I got up, and went to my bedroom, getting dress for my Quidditch practice I had today. I knew that Patrick Bones would push me harder than ever before, because I was late.  
  
But I didn't care. I was going to a romantic dinner with Lily, and today would be the night, when I tell her my undying love... 


End file.
